that damn "carry out" song has been in my head alllllll day. somethin' i like about timbaland and justin timberlake's voice together, mmm so sessy ;)

attention, shifted.

WOMP.

hehehehe last night was the best. it's crazy how i still managed to get a good 6.5 hours of sleep, i'm so proud of the shift i worked today, it was crazy, i hit my head realllly hard, even had to file an incident report and was seriously talked to about going to the hospital (sorta funny) AND still pulled through. i'm so serious about picking up this office job, or at least something similar to it. i need to pull in some serious dough and step up my game. even when i was working some 30+ hrs a week at h&m i was making bank. im tryna get to that level again so i can get myself a cute little car that doesn't take well over $50 to fill up. although i do LOVE my old rugged truck. she's cute in her own way. anyway, it feels so great to have such a good night with a massive amount of people i hardly even knew. i love mingling, especially when there are good guys there. not gross ass, "uhhh girllll, come ova here" type dudes. AND my favorite thing about indian lakes...DIVERSITY. oh boy, i really love my life. i can't wait till my dad gets here wiff the baaaaaaaabiiiiesssss and jassss <333

yeeeeee! ;D

I need a change of scenery, i realllly wanna get out of here and try living some place different. i loved traveling by myself, and i really don't feel like living somewhere out of state would be all that bad. i would miss certain people, a lot. however, this is something i feel would really give me a sense of myself. i feel like it would be great. fuck school, obviously i would move somewhere where i could transfer to a different H&M so i would have a job already. it just seems great. i wouldnt have medical insurance, but i could manage. i want to do this. i really do.

i cannot have expectations.
this is out of my hands.
and out of control.

witchy woman, she's got the moon in her eye.

i live for days/nights like this.
kelly's last night was amazing, even with kristina being wayyy too drunk for me to deal with, i dealt with her, and i LOVE my best friend. taylor, too. and ryan. i love them. sometimes all you need are your roots.

anyways, i woke up with a MEAN hangover, and now i'm at my grandma's house, recuperating. sleep, greasy food, and movies! hollaaaa. i'd love to talk more, but i've gotta go dance to the eagles.



Well I know you want a lover,
let me tell your brother,
she's been sleeping in the Devil's bed.
And there's some rumors going round
someone's underground
she can rock you in the nighttime 'til your skin turns red

wooo hooo, witchy woman see how high she flies
wooo hooo, witchy woman she got the moon in her eye

like lions do.

i just want someone to lay around with, talk shit about weird things/people in our lives, burn some incense, and eat big burritos filled with yummy things. oh, and someone to eat sushi with. someone who likes to read books about drugs, traveling, or just life in general. someone who has an appreciation for art, espcially photography, even if they don't own a camera. someone who will take me to private art shows, or even to the damn Chrysler museum without me having to mention it more than enough times. i want someone who takes me seriously, even when i have a really stupid idea, or a "dumb" suggestion. someone who tells me exactly how i look in those jeans, or that top, even if they know it's my favorite shirt and i really honestly look like a goon. someone who likes GOOD movies, such as the breakfast club, the goonies, and can't hardly wait. someone who isn't afraid to put me in my place, but doesn't do so in an immature "i'm the guy and you're the girl so do what i say" sort of way. someone who likes, no, loves GOOD music and can deal with my feminine music from time to time. somebody who i can explore with, have fun with, sleep next to while dealing with my constant need to tuck my feet under his, someone to laugh with, cry with, and conquer all the ups & downs in between without making me feel like i'm always in the wrong. someone who is okay with my sexual side and how i am not afraid to talk about it amongst our mutual friends. someone who will never get in my face, and respect my boundaries when we fight. someone who is willing to admit fault. someone who has a job, a car, a license, and a SMART amount of interest in illegal activities. someone to go to the beach with, even when it's cold out and i just need to get some fresh air. someone who will let me pay for the movie tickets every now and again. somebody who introduces me to his friends and doesn't need to be reminded that i'm there. someone who will teach me how to play their favorite video game so that i don't always feel left out. someone who reminds me how certain sports work when i forget. someone who opens the door, or says thank you when i do. someone who is cute, funny, sexy, smart, handsome, and charming. someone who i can trust. someone who says exactly what they mean. someone who takes time. someone who gives me the time of day.


someone.

andy hull's wife is the luckiest gal alive.


"don't worry about it, i heard what you said and it's good
and i appreciate it more than any other man ever could

i believe you, anyways
i believe you, any day

when i told you i loved you god dammit i meant it
when i told you i loved you, good jesus, i meant it

now your legs look like firecrackers, are you still alive
yeah no shit your not breathing, but man i can feel you inside!

don't waste away, under the ground
cause I'm wasting away, under the ground"

last night, i was driving home from dog sitting at a friend's house, and on baxter i saw a duck just sitting there, right in the path of my passenger side tire, so i swerved at the last minute, and completely avoided him. i thought about going back and "shooing" him out of the middle of the street, but decided i was too tired. this morning, i did the same thing, around 11...on the way home, i passed where i had seen the duck and there was nothing but feathers and blood, a lot of it. it made me feel like the worst person on the face of this earth for not going back and making him move. really, really sad. and really, really guilty.

i've been throwing up over this ledge for the last 7 weeks
and you've been throwing history to hell

i've been writing almost everyday that i've been gone
do you still remember how my beard once felt

i've been eating seaweed from a whale named emily
she could swallow me, or help swallow my pride

we wade under the tow like diamonds
we wade under the tow like diamonds

i've been watching you look at a locket from your mother
or perhaps its from a girl you don't speak of

do you miss her when your sleeping
do you find it hard to eat when
everything reminds you of her stilly ghost

so to captains of my captain how can i become i captain
get the strength i need to pull this one around

i will wait under the tow like lions
i will wait under the tow like lions

like lions do.

oh my god, what am i doing here?

and i walk this ship of golden brown
you sit back covered up sounds
that don't come from my lips
you know they don't come from my lips

and you can try to break the silence
while you making love with violence
to my flesh and blood a traitor
oh my flesh and blood are traitors to you now

"how easy it would be if we could see the plan, but really what's the plan?"

i feel like shit.
my best friend is going to court.
probably straight to jail.
and my life is gunna fall apart.
seriously.
who the fuck else am i gunna hang out with at 2 in the morning,
when my life is in shambles?
fuck.
fuck.
fuck.

"A woman can handle almost anything if you tell her the truth about it, but if you lie to her, you will undermine her faith in herself, & ultimately her trust in you. Tell her the truth. Let her work it out. You can damage love & love will repair; but once you damage trust, you’ve got a rough road to walk. A lie needs support, but the truth stands alone."