today is caitlin's birthday - happy birthday, you crazy crazy girl. i love you!

today is also the day jasmine and levi get back to the states. i'm not sure when, but i think it was either very early this morning, or very late tonight. i should probably figure that out though. hmph. july 3rd is coming much faster than expected. i cannot wait to see my dad. i am definitely excited about jas & levi being here because i miss them to no end and it will give me more family to spend my lonely, jobless days with, but seeing my dad compares to nothing else. i want to find a man just like him, someone real, honest, and goal-oriented. i guess it's true when people say women seek men similar to their father. that's always sounded strange to me, but i guess it's the truth because no matter who your father is or what mistakes he has made, you are always bound to him and you always have this idea of just how wonderful he really is. you know? at least that's how i feel most of the time. i feel like i am so ahead of people my age, i hate it. i want to be normal, and in love without worrying about things only i think of because i over think every fucking thing in my life. i feel like i am going crazy in this town, being surrounded by the people in it. i need to get out, i hate everyone here. (except you, you, you, you and of course you.) i don't know how many you's are in there, but it should be more than enough to cover the few people left who don't make me want to rip my hair out. fuck today, and screw tomorrow. although i did just get a call for an interview at papaya. jesus christ ^ please let me get this job.